Today’s Most Funniest Movie Bloopers

(Originally appeared on McSweeney’s, November 8 1999)

Look closely at some of today’s hit movies. How could these multimillionaire Hollywood bigshots be so careless? A few examples:

“The Story of Us”

In the suburban household where Katie and Ben Jordan (Michelle Pfeiffer, Bruce Willis) live with their two teenage children, a delivery man emerges in a key scene wearing a black leather jacket with a gold zipper on the right-breast pocket. In the very next scene, however, the delivery man is still wearing a black leather jacket with a gold zipper on the right-breast pocket, but Mr. Willis’s wig looks ridiculous.

“Bowfinger”

When Kit Ramsey (Eddie Murphy)–searching for his girlfriend in a Hollywood restaurant–picks up a pack of matches and sticks it into his briefcase, it is evident that a broken chair lies next to the jukebox. Look closely, however, after the camera returns to the jukebox after panning away for a moment. The broken chair still remains next to the jukebox, but Eddie Murphy is an asshole.

“Crazy in Alabama”

In the Huntsville, Alabama, police station where Lucille (Melanie Griffith) waits patiently to speak with the detective in charge of investigating her husband’s murder, a doorway is clearly marked with a sign that reads EXIT. A policeman walks through the entrance-way and motions for Lucille to follow him into his office. In the previous scene, however, Miss Griffith’s Southern accent sucks.

[Author’s Note: Although Michael Sacks has not seen any of these movies, one can factually assume that Michael Sacks thinks Eddie Murphy is an asshole.]